meta meta meta: EBERT VS. STEIN

I love this metafilter thread commenting on Roger Ebert's recent smackdown of Ben Stein in relation to some creationsist documentary. This is a great thread for no other reason but the sporadic "evolution" of the phrase:
"I say this on Bad Astronomy the other day, and enjoyed it a lot. Ebert's a pretty smart dude." (sic)

I sap this on Bad Astronomy the other day, and enjoyed it a lot. Ebert's a pretty smart dude.

I sag this on Bad Astronomy the other day, and enjoyed it a lot. Ebert's a pretty smart dude.

A pretty bad smart astronomy dude says the other day, 'Ebert on this. And I enjoyed it a lot.

I was this on Sad Astronomy the other way, and unfolded it a dot. Ebert's a pretty start frood.

I sat this on Sad Astrology the mother way, and unfolded it a dot. Peebert's a pretty stamp froot.


LINK to thread

New Deerhoof

Okay, the video is really nothing special, sort of a feel-good trip down memory lane, but It's well executed...and I'm a huge Deerhoof fan (paid $20 to see them do 2 songs...I was late).

my answering machine message

Best use of tilt shift technique

Metal Heart from Keith Loutit on Vimeo.

Little Dragon

gets with some chocolate company for a sweet spot. 




Here's the music video for the song "Fortune".

NEW Egyptian HULK

Let's see my HULK checklist here...

1) can bend coins with his eye
2) has sex 15 times a day with each of his 4 wives
3) is prohibited from working (due to his enormous strength)
4) drinks melted butter and eats raw mutton
5) has never slept a night in his life

Highland Park = Raccoon City?

Check out these pics from an abandoned municipal building in Highland Park Michigan. This is eerily similar to the Raccoon City police station in "Resident Evil 2". I spent many a night jumping out of my skin playing this game, and it seems awfully weird that there are firearms, ammunition, and crime scene photos still laying around, just like the game, where you are constantly on the search for ammo, and you need to examine the environment for clues to continue the game.

Original source

Gameplay from Resident Evil 2, go to about 15:00 for the police station...

rust belt decline

The entire northwest Ohio region (Toledo and Lucas county) has
one of the highest unemployment rates in the state. I've been up here for the past two weeks, and almost every day there is an announcement of new layoffs.

I don't like the idea of an auto bailout, but if it doesn't happen, it's curtains for Toledo.

By the way, "Joe" the plumber worked on my mom's toilet. Then it broke two weeks later. Also, he's unemployed.

The hardest working troll...

on the internets. Really...how can people think this is legit? Well, read the comments, because "she" reels them in consistently.

"Havenworks"...

kicks it old school!

MST3K boys reminisce...

God, I miss that show. I distinctly remember every Thanksgiving, when Comedy Central would run a MST3K marathon. Here's a link to an interview with Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, and Jim Mallon, who were the originators of MST3K.

It doesn't sound like they're going to start another series, but they have this project, Cinematic Titanic, where you can download and burn DVDs.

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I voted

..the place was Barackin'.

I f%*ked up

John Hodgman has a new book

Here's a quick interview with "Roger Numbers".

Experimental 3D applications

Kudos to Rich for sending me these...



RabbitHoles 3D Motion Holograms: Gnomon Gallery, SIGGRAPH, and Pixologic / Gnomon Party from douglas johnson on Vimeo.



ILoveSketch from Seok-Hyung Bae on Vimeo.

random links

garbage cars Self explanatory.

clusta Sweet design blog.

GOOD -video Political and other short video essays.

Art of the Title Great hi-res movie title sequences. They have a limited selection, though.

Star Wars comes home

You may have seen this already...which proves my point again - anything is cool if it's motion tracked.



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Foreign accent database

I can't tell you how many times I hear a weird accent on my morning commute on the subway and want to find out what country they're from. Oh, right...anyway, this is pretty cool. You can even submit one of your own.

All the foreign accents.

Dodgeball group

A bunch of guys from work are into this...maybe a little too into it. Be sure to click on "meet my balls" to get an accurate description of the arsenal.

Link

What I've been watching all week

Really, you can only take Tim and Eric in small doses. The show is so dumb and over the top that it gets me every time. It's like you're falling asleep on the couch in front of the TV, and you have a fever dream that was shot with a tube camera. Oh, and then someone went apeshit with photoshop filters and clip art.

Link to loads of Tim and Eric clips.

Will Forte's "Lazy Horse" mattress commercial

More of the "Lazy Horse" nightmare sequence

Cinco "Facts" machine "Makin' it E-Z!" Why send faxes when you can receive FACTS!

Elis Regina + Dosh = Cibelle

Elis Regina...pure Braizilan soul.



Dosh's "Calling the Kettle Black"...electronic looping auteur.



Cibelle. Sounds like she's got one mic for singing and one for looping and effects. Plus she's got a great set of pins.

Thanks for the link, Rich!

The Onion has political blog

This is good. Some of their bloggers include "Gary Brunson, a 4-week old fetus" and "Dac Kien, a retired vietnamese torturer".

Link to blog.

My first geocache

My friend Todd and I went geocaching a couple weeks ago. Basically it's like a treasure hunt, only instead of a map you use GPS, and instead of treasure, it's junk. The best booty was a playing card with "Robert" scrawled across it...also, I'm just recovering from the poison ivy I got while we ran around Avon Woods park looking for another cache. So...success!

Did anyone see Beowulf?

I know it was all CG, but I found some raw footage from the shoot somehow. I'm pretty sure this is the party scene right before Grendel shows up.

Bubbles and jazz...

...at a 1000 frames per second. Sort of a follow up to the previous post about things that are automatically awesome.


Bubbles from Nick Campbell on Vimeo.

Minilogue video

You can motion track anything into some handheld footage and it looks awesome. Not to slight this animation, which is cool, but just sayin'.

Get Your War On

"...you wanna impress me, eat a car stereo, or a..a..deep fried encyclopedia..."

VH1 top 20 at Lightborne

They shot this out our 4th floor window...

I've got an attempt at the world record for "being on hold" going on right now...going past 4 hours.

Animation test

...something I was messing with today...

Don Caballero

I saw them last night at Northside Tavern. This clip isn't from that show, but it's one the best sounding ones I could find on youtube. What's weird is the drummer's snare is down by his ankles!

Sarah Palin...?

This could very well be photoshopped. In any case...wa-wa-wee-wa!

Naive New Beaters

This video is pretty sweet. The band holds green boards, in which is keyed other takes of the same setup. The choreography between the two is what sells it. Nice. Shades of Michel Gondry. The song is good too.



BTW, I found this on upl8.tv, which is a random youtube flash player. Hit the space bar to go to the next clip.

Link to UPL8.TV

Spam

Here's a sampler of some of my spam:

For: dave Black Panthers Sue White Guys For Stealing Copyrighted Gesture

For: dave "I Won't Raise Taxes," Says Schwarzenegger, "except For The Indians."

Bring back time when girls were yours.

For: dave I hate you.

(also, some classy gifs...)













































I would love to hear the conversation between the client and the graphic designer on this one:

"...no, make him sadder...and put a bandage on his head..."
"Should we give him wheel chair gloves?"
"...nah, he looks more pathetic without the gloves..."

Convincing CG

This company Image Metrics analyzes video of an actor's performance, then creates a facial animation that matches pretty damn close. They say they eyes are 90% of the performance, but to me it's the subtleties around the mouth that are the give away.

Local celebrity sighting

So we were in Yellow Springs today, and I took my camera because, ya just never know what you'll come across. In the back of my mind I knew that Dave Chappelle lives there, and wouldn't it be great if we ran into him and were able to have our picture taken with him.
We had lunch at the "Winds", which was great, and just as we were leaving the restaurant, who should be strolling towards us but Dave. Looking back on it, he was smoking and looking everywhere but at us...probably for fear of exactly what happened next.

"Hey Dave!"
"...hey..."
"Hey, uh can I get a picture with you?"
"...nah, man."
"Oh. Ok."
(mumbles something incomprehensible)

Later, I remembered he hated fame and celebrity, and that was why he likes to live in Yellow Springs...to avoid people like me.

Oh God, "The Stabilizer" rocks

Okay. So we had another "bad movie night" last night, and it's definitely up there with "Gymkata". "The Stabilizer" is an Indonesian action flick from 1984 which has some very tasteful nude scenes, is littered with expletives, and is so relentless in things blowing up, people getting shot, and cars jumping off ramps,...it's mind-numbing. I decided to share some scenes, and don't for a second think that this is an exhaustive sampling, because this film brings it, and brings it hard.




These are literally the first frames of the movie. I mean, c'mon. I was laughing non-stop from this point.




This scene is timed brilliantly. Love the stock 747 shot too.




Uhh...beergasm?



This is the takeaway catch-phrase of the movie. Wait for it.



"Just a little anti-American sentiment running around..."



The physics involved with this action sequence are so wrong they're right. Watch the dude on the right when they go back to get the gun..he just smacked his ass!




Oh, If only my conversations were so effortless.




Yeah, I got hit in the head with a bucket...what about it. How about I just jump up and bust yer ass through the floor?



Wait...what? What was that? That's not spit!




What just happened here? There's an explosion, then she carefully lays on the ground?!




Again, wait for it.




I was imagining all sorts of great death scenes for the bad guy, but this wasn't it.

Re: Cephalopod

Matthew Baldwin of Defective Yeti fame, writes for The Morning News.

Here's his most recent piece, a dystopian comedy of errors, with pleny of typos.

Link to Re: Cephalopod

Tomorrow I'm going to the Cincinnati ATP night match...

Some pics...

Apparently we're putting employee photos on our company's website. Here a few, I think I'm going with the car wreck one. Enjoy.

Tracy Morgan - How to be Black

Here's my favorite one liner: "Have you ever broken a puerto rican man's arm for sweatpants money?"

Volvo thinks you're a dumbass

Is there really any way that an intruder can discreetly break into a modern car with a modern security system and wait in the back seat to strangle you? No. The truth is that Volvo can't market this invention the way it is used in real life (e.g. forgetting your baby in the backseat while you get a mani-pedi) because it would imply that people who buy Volvos are jackasses. A couple people have hit on this in the talk around the web too.





discussion1

discussion2

Weekend Pussy Hunt etc.

John Kricfalusi, of Ren and Stimpy fame, went on to make some flash webisodes of "Weekend Pussy Hunt" (starring Cigarettes the Cat) in addition to "The Goddamn George Liquor Program". Incidentally, it looks like there may be new episodes of the latter.

John K. also has a blog called "All Kinds of Stuff" where you can keep up to date with his projects.

This one starts off slow, but there's a couple good gags in the middle, one of which involves a part of the body giving birth (it's not the part you think).

"Weekend Pussy Hunt" #1

Cosplayers in repose

link

Veggie Option blog

I stumbled across "The Veggie Option" today. It's pretty easy being a vegetarian in this city, but we could use a few more spots to hang out...I'm glad this blog is around to get the word out.

Patton Oswalt...

...gave a commencement speech at his old high school.

"First off, I want to thank the teachers and faculty of Broad Run High School for first considering and then inviting me to speak here. It was flattering, I am touched and humbled, and you have made a grave mistake."

Congress passes FISA

If I'm not doing anything illegal I have nothing to fear...right?

link to ACLU press release

(quoted below)

“With one vote, Congress has strengthened the executive branch, weakened the judiciary and rendered itself irrelevant,” said Caroline Fredrickson, Director of the ACLU Washington Legislative Office. “This bill – soon to be law – is a constitutional nightmare. Americans should know that if this legislation is enacted and upheld, what they say on international phone calls or emails is no longer private. The government can listen in without having a specific reason to do so. Our rights as Americans have been curtailed and our privacy can no longer be assumed.”

South Park - World of Warcraft

I know this is late to the party...but it's still a good one.

Replay video | Share video | Watch more videos

My Green Screen Challenge...

...for Colbert Nation. Befittingly titled "Double McNasty". Enjoy.

Drummer nerd break

Terry Bozzio and Chad Wackerman were both drummers in Frank Zappa's band...and they're both insane. I saw Chad play in Detroit with Zappa in '87...I don't remember much about that show due to some chemicals, but the drum solo was somethin else. Terry was in "Missing Persons" with his sister Dale, and after that he did some solo stuff. I've never seen anyone play like him.

Guess What?

There's been a neighborhood kid going around lately telling everyone he farted. This was a couple of weeks ago, the kid is probably about 8 or 9, old enough to know that he is basically screwing with people. Today I was mowing the lawn and he comes up to me.

"Hi"
"Hey"
"Guess what?"
"I know, you farted. That's awesome...congratulations."

He looks at me with a blank stare and then shuffles off on his scooter.

The World According to Monsanto

I'm still not sure if all the genetically modified food is bad for you, but the way that Monsanto runs it's business leads me to believe that they're up to no good. If you have a spare hour or two check it out...

LINK to video.

More local news

Peeping tom hides the evidence...

Pre-fab houses

My latest wish is for a plot of land in the city and put a cheap pre-fab house on it.
The LVL home is pretty sweet, and only $42,000. Here's a link to a flickr slideshow of an open house.




Clever Homes has some cool designs as well, I like the CH5 model with a courtyard and a rooftop garden. Too bad it's $300,000.

Modern Shed has some small simple designs that would make a sweet backyard.

Garth Marenghi's "Darkplace"

"The Twilight Zone" + "General Hospital" x "Police Squad" = Darkplace

Cincinnati gets street view

I was looking at real estate the other day and noticed that Google street view has finally hit Cincinnati!

Japanese game show 3.0

Not sure if it's a game show, really...maybe just an exhibition.

Cincinnata

Here's a couple of links to keep you updated on our region:

Dude sprays women's shoes.

Inventor of the Pringles can is buried in one.

More Italian Spiderman

Episode 1 doesn't disappoint...

Reggie Bannister vs. Powers Booth

I recently watched "Phantasm" the other day, and was shocked and dismayed to learn that Powers Booth was not in it.  Ever since hight school,  I took it for granted that it was he who played "Reggie" in the first two movies...but in fact it was "Reggie Bannister".  C'mon, you see it right?

Foot in mouth?

I was at Barnes and Noble the other day looking at magazines and killing time with my friends Rich and Laura.

Me - Hey check it out. There's a magazine called "I'm Pregnant!" I made a point of saying "exclamation point" after the title too...

We had a good chuckle, I asked if he would like a subscription for his birthday etc..

Then after the laughter subsides, a pregnant lady that was sitting and reading on the bench in front of me quietly stands up, goes to the magazine rack, and returns the very same magazine.

Oh well, it's not like I said anything really bad...which is surprising to say the least.

Chicago Restaurant roundup

I was in Chicago recently and here is my take on a few eateries:

Frontera Grill
-simply awesome...an explosion of flavor, margaritas are exceptional, although I could do without the lady who had the coughing fit...

Milk and Honey
-not bad French toast...mine is better

Star of Siam
-pedestrian, uninspired, I'll give it my lowest rating ever, 7 thumbs up.

Lou Manalti's
-apparently this is the "real Chicago deep dish"...it's pretty good, probably great loaded with sausage and pepperoni

Tempo Cafe
-not much to say about this one...just basic breakfast fare

The Map Room
- great beer drinker's bar with plenty of beards and Belgian brews...I had the Delirium Tremens followed by the Capital porter

HOLY FUCK

...is playing at the Gypsy Hut tonight. I should get off my ass and see them, even though my acid days are over.

Martin Circus (?)

If you can make it through the "Carousel sequence from Logan's Run" you'll be rewarded with some oversized fuzzy slippers, velvet jumpsuits, and a dude with daisy dukes. Oh, and an awesome groove. Thanks, Nate.

People are funny when mad

A friend of mine described a run-in with an irate customer at the car wash he used to work at.

The guy was so upset that he uttered a couple of hilarious phrases:

• 1  "I'm gonna beat your ass in sandals." 

• 2  "I'm gonna punch you in the optics."

If someone said those things to me, I would have been like..."Uh, can we hang out sometime?"

Breadmaker

I had a sickening dream last night about visiting a vegan family.

At one point, the father asks "Who wants to squeeze one out?" Then his young son appears in the living room and starts straining like he's gonnna take a shit. He can't do it.
"Always a trickle from him!" says the father.
So his daughter comes out next and proceeds to strain and low and behold these giant plastic bags of bread come out her ass! Turns out they're so vegan that they figured out a way to use the heat of the body to bake bread internally, and then shit out perfectly formed loaves.
"If you slice the bread completely through the bag, you probably won't get hepatitis."

That's the last time I mix Dewey's pizza with beer and scotch...

Kenny Chesney 2007

Here is a smackerel of some tour graphics we did last year. This was from Kenny's opening show in lovely Omaha.

Tim and Eric - Encounters

Dumb/hilarious jokes

Metafilter has a thread about surprisingly short jokes. Megosteve has got my number...

No Respect

Here's a snippet of a conversation between my brother-in-law and a co-worker:

Co-worker:  "...I work at this place called Lightborne"

Brother-in-law:  "...oh yeah, my brother-in-law works at Lightborne too"

Co-worker:  "Really?  What's his name?"

Brother-in-law:  "I don't know."

 

So through a description of my person by the co-worker, my brother-in-law learned my name.

Ok, it's not like I just recently married his sister (it will be 13 years this June). It's not like she's his half-sister or step-sister or something. They are blood relatives. He was around when I was dating her back in '93. He was at the wedding. He put a crown in my mouth last year. How is this possible? 

Robot, get up.

It seems the scientists have taken away our final defense against the robots...pushing them over.

Italian Spiderman

This thing doesn't let up for a second. Hilarious.

Come hither desktop

download

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I've seen the future...

...and it looks a lot like "Logan's Run"...only in Columbia.

•link to slideshow•


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Absolut Tim and Eric

Supposedly, Absolut vodka hired Zach Galifianakis to do some spots and here's one of 'em...

Arghhh!!

Thanks, Jeremiah.

J and H Productions

My friend Ralph tipped me off to this phenomenon. Apparently this guy is announcing the startup of a production company with this audio manifesto, which I've been listening to for about 5 minutes and still have no idea what he's talking about.

Here's his MYSPACE PAGE with the stilted rant.

**UPDATE** I didn't watch that movie on there, which points out that whoever made this page is obviously not the guy who made the tape...still funny anyway.

My old SEGA

I was at my brother-in-law's house for easter today, and my nephew and I found the PGA Tour III game I used to have. Top 3 saved golfer names:

1) Dr. Roast
2) oooooo
3) BUTT^Steak (who had the course record of 63 at TPC Sawgrass)

Also, the top three airline names from our Aerobiz game, which would go on for months...

1) StuAir
2) AirLog
3) SkyAss

41 Hilarious Science Fair Experiments

41 Hilarious Science Fair Experiments

I found this through presurfer...

photobasement seems nice...

How To Throw Your Voice

Years ago I found this weird mp3 from Sharpeworld.com (now on permanent hiatus it seems) of some hillbilly instruction on how to throw your voice. I consider this to be one of the major highlights of my surfing career, and you would be wise to download it and listen intently. This is way too good not to share with everyone...please spread the magic.
Some details: it's very long (about 16 minutes) and gets a little repetitive at times, but you have to listen to the end, preferably with some friends and some beers.

Boomp3.com

How to Throw Your Voice


Here's Jennifer Sharpe's mySpace page. She deserves the credit on this find.

Awesome Burger King commercial

Thanks to Kyle for bringing this awesome Burger King commercial to my attention.

Bigfoot and Wildboy

This show opener is exciting, but I bet you couldn't watch an episode without crying from boredom.

How to spend yer $600.

Bert and Ernie death

I sort of remember this segment on Sesame Street.



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Cloverfield sucks

So I've been thinking about the movie Cloverfield recently and why it didn't work. I'm comparing it to the Blair Witch Project (BWP), because both movies were supposedly "artifacts" that were found and then shown to us without editing etc.

I liked BWP, mainly because the script kept you in the dark as to what was happening. Yes, we knew that there was a witch, but the teeth in the torn shirt, the screaming in the dark, the bizarre talismans, all contributed to the weirdness, which took the viewer along for the ride. With each new development, we learn a little more about the evil the trio are entering.

With Cloverfield, there is none of that suspense. Once you see the head of the statue of liberty land on the street (which was shown in the very first commercials for the movie) you knew exactly what you were in for. Okay, a monster. And that's all that happens. Various scenes of the monster attacking. Repeatedly. Then it's over. Also, the characters were rich, attractive manhattanites, and I couldn't wait for them to get crushed.

Both movies gave no exposition, no explanation as to how these events happened.* That's okay, but the mystery of BWP draws the viewer deeper, whereas the mystery of Cloverfield is just frustrating. The headache I got from the shakiness in BWP sort of added to the whole experience too, like the movie screwed up my brain, but the headache from Cloverfield was just a headache.

*Before BWP was released, there was an hour-long "documentary" on Sci-fi, which told the story of how this film was recovered,and put it in context with other "historical" documents that shed light into the origin of the witch. I liked this better than the movie!

Shrub as horse thief

A Harper's article which brilliantly illustrates the concept of irony in relation to Bush's presidency.


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All the Hulk transformations

I have no way of knowing if this is true or not, but this guy says he listed all the ways in which David Banner turned into the Hulk.

Bad Movie Night

We had a "bad movie night" screening at my house last night. The standout was "Gymkata". Highly entertaining.

Northwest Ohio Female Barbershop Quartet pics

I'm gonna represent some Ohio pride here and give you a selection of pics from a Northwest Ohio Female Barbershop Quartet contest.

Wipeout x3

I love the trend in wipeout videos to replay the crash over and over, each time slower than the last.

I, for one, am grateful for our...

"The 10 PM curfew for all things made of flesh feels a little restrictive to me."


In The Know: Are We Giving The Robots That Run Our Society Too Much Power?

Ten best music videos of 2007

Ten best music videos of 2007. I'm late...I live in Cincinnati, cut me some slack.

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During the entire year of 2007, I kept referring to it as 2008. I'm so glad that I'm synched up again.

Modern Houses

Sweet photoset
of southern california modern homes.


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80's Consoles

"Consoles I Have Known". I have fond memories of my own Colecovision console, playing hours of Zaxxon, Cosmic Avenger, and Venture.

I'm such a big Lynch fan, that I'm just going to post whatever I find about him.

Sweet animation I've seen the first episode awhile ago, looks like they have another. Click on "watch"

Billboard decapitations.